3 September 2014

PARENTING - 5 Ways to Deal With Teen Angst







By Mary Jo DiLonardo
Reviewed By Hansa D. Bhargava, MD


So many teenagers worry about so many things: friendships, dating, school, the future. Those stressful and anxious feelings can affect what they eat, how often they move, and how much they sleep.
"Everything is a cause," says William Hansen, PhD. He is a staff psychologist in behavioral medicine and clinical psychology at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital Medical Center. "They're trying to become themselves. They want their own style of hair, of dress, of swagger. The angst really comes from everywhere."
Parents are often caught in the crossfire. Still, there are things you can do to tame the beast of teen angst and anxiety. Help them learn to deal with it in healthy ways -- not by zoning out in video games, marathon text sessions, or a bag of chips. Life will be better for everyone. All of those unhealthy coping strategies can make moodiness worse and are temporary fixes that can cause unhealthy weight gain. Try these five strategies to help.

1. Take a Walk

When your teen is sad, mad, or just out of sorts, he may tend to go to his room to sulk. Or he may want to lose himself in TV or video games. It's much better if you can get him up and moving. Exercise curbs stress hormones and boosts hormones that make you happier.
"Have them put on earbuds and take a walk," says Hansen. "Get some fresh air and blow off some steam for 20 minutes. Find healthy ways to take care of yourself.  Exercise is one of the greatest things."
Better yet, take a walk with him. It will give you some quality time together, even if you don't talk. Plus, it will show that you practice what you preach. It doesn't do any good if you tell your kid to get moving while you park yourself on the couch with a bag of chips. Kids learn by example -- mainly from you!

2. Go for a Drive

One of the best times to talk with your teen is in the car, says Hansen. You have a captive audience and no one has to make eye contact.
Ask about her day and what's going on in her life. Try not to disagree with her, says psychologist David Elkind, PhD, author of The Hurried Child. If she's upset that she doesn't have the coolest friends or clothes, for example, don't jump to say, "You don't need friends like that," or "You don't need to dress like other kids."
"Show your child that you understand how he or she feels. Say, 'I'm sure that must make you sad.' Or, 'I'm sure you must be disappointed,'" Elkind says.

3. Take a Break

When kids are young and cranky, you put them in timeout to cool off. When they're teens, they need to learn when it's time to give themselves a break. Some can de-stress by listening to music -- even if it's loud and doesn't sound all that calming to you. Others might relax with yoga or meditation. Or maybe there's a hobby like journaling, drawing, or playing an instrument that will get your teen's mind off life for a while.

4. Fix Food and Sleep

"We make bad decisions when we're angry, hungry, lonely, or tired," Hansen says.
Help your teen make healthy choices by explaining that. For example, being tired can make people crave high-calorie foods. But that doesn’t mean to go for a 2-liter soda and deep-dish pizza. They have the power to choose healthy foods.
Then check your pantry and make it easier for them to do that. Stock up on nutritious snacks: fresh fruit and cut-up veggies, low-fat yogurt, reduced-fat cheese, and whole wheat crackers. If chips and ice cream aren't around, teens will be more likely to eat healthy choices.
Also, emphasize that enough sleep is so important. Not only can a lack of sleep lead to unhealthy eating and moodiness, it’s also linked to not wanting to move, bad grades, car accidents, and concentration problems. Teens need at least 8 1/2 hours of sleep a night. If yours doesn't get even close to that, it may be time to re-evaluate his daily schedule.
"I think there has to be a sit down where you say, 'You're burning the candle at both ends and it's just not healthy,'" Hansen says. Figure out which activities are most important and cut where you can. There has to be room for healthy sleep.

5. Resist the Urge to Argue Back

If your teen tests your patience, remember that teens argue just because they can, Elkind says.
"It's like when children learn to count and they ask you for lists of numbers just so they can count them. Now they want to argue because they have the newfound ability to do it," he says.
Don't take it personally. "There are so many changes going on -- physically, emotionally, socially. Try to take it easy on them and be understanding."

Source: http://www.webmd.com/


No comments:

Post a Comment