Article by Kavya Parnami
Children nowadays are very fastidious or choosy and listen to things or orders that their parents have to say according to their own convenience. They most of the times, neglect the instructions of their parents and do things according to their own will and mood. This may sometimes even cause big problems and can thus lead to ‘difficult to overcome’ consequences. Parents have tried almost anything which consists of explaining the children about the details of the tasks to be done, punishing their children, bribing them with gifts, reminding them about the tasks again and again, ignoring and not talking to them, scolding the children and sometimes even begging in front of their children so that the children listen to what parents have to say to them. But it is very difficult for the parents to make their children responsible and conformable when the child is just not ready to cooperate and ignores every single request that parents make to the child. This article consists of simple ten tips that parents must adopt in order to make their child follow their instructions and this can even help to improve the relationship between the parents and children.
10. DO NOT SHOUT
Shouting or yelling does not help in any situation. Scolding your child for little things will not make him listen to you, but rather will make him more aggressive and stubborn. One should talk or communicate in a soft tone and in a calm manner. Parents can even use sarcasm in their tone but it should not point out the mistakes of their child but should only be used to make him realize that he is wrong because sometimes speaking something sarcastically in a funny tone also leaves an impact and can make your child listen to you. Therefore, it is very important to explain things calmly rather than in a loud tone, if parents want their child to listen to them.
9. EXPRESS YOUR FEELINGS AND EXPECTATIONS
It is very important to express yourself and what you expect if you want someone to listen to you. Unless and until the person does not know about how you feel and what you want and expect from him, he cannot behave accordingly. Same goes with the children, as when parents will not talk about their expectation and dream, the children will not know that what their parents expect from them. To stand up to the parents expectations, it is very important for the children to be aware of the dreams and expectations of their parents. Thus, parents should share their feelings and expectations, if they want an obedient child who listens to them.
8. DO NOT COMPARE YOUR CHILD WITH OTHER CHILDREN
The thing that children hate the most is when their parents compare them with other children. Every child is different and possesses different caliber and interests. It is very important that parents understand this fact. Comparing will not help any parent to make their child listen to them rather it will just increase the gap of communication between them. Parents should understand their child’s interest and hobbies and should encourage them. This will make their child more comfortable to discuss his interests to them and they can also give advice as and when required to make their child’s future better and brighter.
7. KEEP YOUR ORDERS SIMPLE AND ACCURATE
Nobody like big and boring lectures, whether it be children or adults. If parents want their children to listen to them, then they should avoid giving lectures and should speak in straight and simple language. A single word with a little command in tone can make your child listen to you which can never be achieved by giving long boring lectures on how to be responsible and obedient. So, parents should use simple and accurate words and should order in a tone which is up to the point as it will make their child realize about the seriousness of the task and he will complete it as soon as possible.
6. BEHAVE LIKE A CHILD
Children nowadays are more influenced by the people of their age or the people who share the same thinking as theirs. If parents want their child to be submissive, they should first be aware of their child’s thinking and his point of view. They should understand their child’s point of view and should explain him things accordingly. When a child finds similarities in his thinking and his parent’s point of view, he will listen to them and will also share important things of his life with them. So, parents should behave like a child if they want to know their child and want their child to listen to them.
5. TRY AND REDUCE NO’S WITH YES
Saying no for every single thing to the child only increases the distance between the parents and the child. As it is said that you only get what you give, the same thing goes with this situation also. If parents keep saying NO to everything that a child asks for, then he will repeat the same. A child only learns what he observes. So, parents should try and reduce the NO’s and should increase the YES, if they want to be listened to by their children. This obviously does not mean that every single demand of the children have to be fulfilled. But the demands that are not likely to be fulfilled, should not be bluntly rejected rather the parents should make their child understand the reason of not fulfilling the demand. This will make the child more dutiful towards the sayings of the parents.
4. CHECK YOUR WAY OF COMMUNICATION
Communication does not imply just giving orders. Many more things have to be taken care of if parents want their children to be more docile toward their orders. Tone of voice, words and body language, all plays an important role when parents give orders to their children. Tone of Voice should be calm for the first time and then firmness in voice should increase if orders are not completed and at last actions must be taken. Body language plays an important part in giving orders. When orders are given from a close by position from where the child can feel the command in your voice, then these orders leave more impact than any other orders. Last but not the least, the words should be straight and simple and parents should not nag about the tasks which have to be completed. All these things will definitely make the child follow the orders given by his parents.
3. PROVIDE INFORMATION AND FACTS
Providing information about the consequences of the things which are done wrong will also make the children listen to their parents. If children are doing something wrong, then rather than giving orders parents can also state facts and results of the things which are being done wrongly. This will not only make the children follow the instructions given by their parents but will also make them more informative about the facts.
2. PRAISE YOUR CHILD
Praising your child for his good actions will motivate him and he will work will all the more enthusiasm to complete his task more efficiently, next time. A child’s heart is very pure and overwhelms will even little words of praise. So, parents should appreciate the work done by their children, if they want their children to obey their orders.
1. LISTEN TO YOUR CHILD
The most important thing to do is to take out time for the children and listen to everything they have to say may it be their ideas, their hopes, the events that took place in their life, about their friends, their school life and almost everything which they have in store to tell. This will then make the child to listen to his parents as the parents were always there to listen to him.
Source: http://listdose.com/top-10-ways-to-make-your-child-listen-to-you
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